Jax Taylor was afraid to leave the rehab facility where he sought treatment for mental health issues earlier this year amid marital difficulties with his soon-to-be ex Brittany Cartwright.
While there, the 45-year-old star of The Valley, who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder, found comfort in the structure of the program.
'I got there, I f***ing hated it and.. then I loved it,' he said in a clip from his and Cartwright's When Reality Hits podcast posted on Instagram.
After getting used to the place Taylor said he didn't want to leave. 'I was so sad leaving. I was crying, I'm like "I don't want to go."'
The former Vanderpump Rules star said he enjoyed the structure being in rehab provided for him.
Jax Taylor, 45, said he was 'so scared' to leave rehab, where he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and PTSD. 'I f***ing hated it and.. then I loved it,' he said on his When Reality Hits podcast
'I knew what I was doing. I was reading, I was in that world,' he explained.
His fear of returning to his real life because he felt, 'the world is going to hit me like a ton of bricks.'
'And I got to go back to filming my show and I know everybody's mad at me and they're gonna come at me and I was just like "I'm so scare, I'm so scared" and it's been happening and I've been dealing with it, but it's scary,' he said.
Elsewhere in the podcast he spoke about his pending divorce from Cartwright, 35.
His The Valley costar filed for divorce August 27, citing 'irreconcilable differences.'
'I understand why she did [it]. I'll always love and care for Brittany. She's the mother of my beautiful son [Cruz],' he told his audience.
Jax and Brittany were married for five years, welcoming son Cruz in 2021.
He joked that he would 'make an excellent ex-husband.'
Jax continued: 'It's been a really, really rough week. Anyone that has gone through a divorce will understand how difficult this is.'
Elsewhere in the podcast he spoke about his pending divorce from Cartwright, 35; pictured in March 2023
He said he wants their relationship to 'be amicable,' adding that eventually 'hopefully [become] really, really good friends one day.'
Cartwright has requested primary legal and physical custody over the child, however she is open to visitation for her ex.
Additionally, the Kentucky native is seeking to block the ability of the court to award either one of them with spousal support.
She cited their date of separation as January 24.
The former server felt like filing for divorce was a 'long time coming,' per People's source who said she knew 'she had to' file for divorce 'for the best interest of herself and her son.'
The now-single mom filed 'in order to move forward and put a stop to this tumultuous cycle they've been living in,' the insider added.
The source added: 'There's a lot that has transpired over the past few months that she could not look past.'
'This decision wasn't made lightly but she feels adamant that it was the right one,' the insider added.
The couple's early romance was chronicled on the Bravo series Vanderpump Rules and the breakdown of their marriage was captured on the spin-off, The Valley, with Cartwright revealing she had moved out their marital residence with son Cruz.
'A lot has happened with me and Jax,' Brittany said in a confessional. 'We were already having issues all summer long, but once the cameras stopped rolling, things just seemed like they were getting worse and worse and worse.
'So about six weeks ago, I separated from Jax. I moved into an AirBnb with Cruz because Jax would not leave the house,' she said on the finale.
Cartwright primary legal and physical custody over the child, however she is open to visitation for her ex
Brittany said that Jax not moving out showed his selfishness. Brittany said she left with their three-year-old son Cruz because the situation at home was toxic. Brittany said Jax would come with a hangover and in the morning would be 'mean as a snake.'
'I just hit this point where I just started noticing everything that he did to me,' Brittany said. 'It just hit me like a ton of bricks.'
Brittany said during their relationship that Jax cheated on her, disrespected her and humiliated her.
'I have been through a lot of pain in this relationship,' Brittany said. 'I just can't deal with it anymore.'
