Sometimes when a door closes, you simply have to wait for it to open.
Or at least that's the stance Teen Mom pair Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra are taking in regard to biological daughter Carly.
Four months after Catelynn revealed her phone number had been blocked by the 15-year-old's adoptive parents Brandon Davis and Teresa Davis, "They definitely have 100 percent closed the adoption," Catelynn recently shared in an exclusive interview with E! News. "I'm still blocked and they recently told me to quit sending gifts because it was inappropriate and uncalled for, just a whole bunch of things."
And while the Michigan-based duo haven't fully given up on forging a connection with Carly, they are trying a new tactic.
Sitting down with their adoption counselor Dawn on the Feb. 6 episode of Teen Mom: The Next Chapter, the couple vented about being blocked by Brandon and Teresa, causing Dawn to play devil's advocate.
"Could it be that if their opinion is different than yours and they've asked for space and they've asked for things to chill and it hasn't happened, then is it the only alternative that they can see?" Dawn reasoned. "And you guys, again, you have to own the fact that you have a lot of power."
Because while Tyler argued they have no power, Dawn pointed to their combined 7.4 million Instagram followers.
"When you put it out on the public platform, on social media," she noted, "I've read the comments. You guys have, too. You know that people just make up their own narrative."
Instagram/Catelynn Baltierra
Catelynn stressed that if the request for space was coming from Carly herself, "We've said 100 percent that we would step back." But, she added, "If it's coming out of Brandon and Teresa's fear and stuff, whether it be insecurity or she's getting older and they're not wanting contact, I will not stop reaching out. I will not stop sending her gifts. I will not do it."
However, asked Dawn, "Is it fair to put that kind of pressure on a young teenager?"
Besides, she reasoned, Carly could literally watch the proof that her biological parents never stopped fighting for her.
"You’ve invested a lot in the relationship that Carly’s going to remember," said Dawn. "She can see the efforts. But, also, she’s in a really difficult position in the middle of the tug-of-war." So to lessen the negative impact, she continued, "Sometimes we have to take a step back."
Initially, Catelynn wasn't interested in any sort of retreat.
"So you just stay silent and don't reach out?" she asked. "It could be forever." The unfairness of the situation was a lot to take, she added, particularly when she entered an open adoption to avoid a life filled with what-ifs.
"I don't think they understand what it does," Catelynn continued of Brandon and Teresa. "I’m like, 'Have you guys ever put yourself in my shoes of what it is like?' You’ve never had to give a child to somebody and live with that for the rest of your life. You know what I mean? It’s just not fair."
Unfortunately, Dawn noted, life rarely is.
And the one strategy they'd yet to try "is just a pause," she reasoned. "Not forever. Just for a time. Just allow yourself to take a pause. We don’t know what tomorrow brings. We don’t know what three months from now is going to be."
Finally convinced, Catelynn acknowledged, "We're just going to take a pause." Added Tyler, "For me, I'm taking a pause until initiation happens not from me."
Instagram/Catelynn Lowell
Though, of course, that doesn't mean they'll stop thinking about Carly.
At home with daughters Nova, 10, Vaeda, 5, and Rya, 3, "We've been very open and honest with our children that we're parenting about Carly and the decisions," Catelynn recently told E! News. "Nova will meet a stranger and tell them my whole adoption journey. And it's just because we've been so open with it."
Photos of Carly still line the house. "I think it's just normal for them," Catelynn shared. "But I do think that it is hard when they ask questions like, 'Why aren't we seeing her?' Because that, in turn, affects them too."
