'Teen Mom's Amber Portwood Doesn't Deserve Forgiveness From Her Daughter Leah

Amber’s journey on reality television began with 16 and Pregnant, which premiered in 2009 and followed her experience as a teenage mom welcoming her daughter with then-boyfriend Gary Shirley. What was initially intended as a one-time documentary quickly turned into a reality TV career when she was cast in Teen Mom, a show that instantly became a hit. Over the years, the series has gone through several rebrands – now known as Teen Mom: The Next Chapter – but Amber has remained a fixture, sharing the most intimate aspects of her life.

Viewers have seen Amber’s messiest moments firsthand – from serving jail time to committing domestic violence on camera, struggling with substance abuse, and facing accusations of absentee parenting. Amber acknowledges her past mistakes, but she’s also insistent that she deserves forgiveness. Yet Leah, who has lived through it all, is now choosing to keep her distance. And that decision makes a lot of sense.

Amber Always Paints Herself as the Victim

“I haven’t slept for two days. I haven’t eaten for two days,” Amber said. "This s--- sucks that my daughter’s turning 16 and she don’t want to see me. She already made it known that she doesn’t want me in her life. I got her presents anyway, and I’m going to write her a card today.”

At surface level, Amber’s reaction may seem like a mother processing hurt feelings. But the way she frames it feels self-centered. Instead of reflecting on why Leah made her decision, Amber repeatedly emphasizes how it affects her. It’s part of her larger pattern of prioritizing her pain over her daughter’s feelings. It’s been frustrating fans for years, so imagine how Leah must feel. Rather than respecting and acknowledging Leah’s boundaries, Amber paints herself like she’s the one who’s been wronged, completely invalidating her daughter’s perspective.

Later in the episode, Leah is showed celebrating her birthday with her dad, step-mom Kristina, and younger sister – at the same restaurant where, last season, Amber called Leah a “dick” after the teen made a comment about Amber’s new relationship. That was the relationship where Amber would later report her fiancé as a missing person, only to find out he had merely ghosted her after an argument while traveling for her brother’s wedding. Looking back, Leah may have been on to something. But Amber completely (and rudely) shut her daughter down, on her birthday no less.

Leah, who has practically grown up on MTV, addressed the camera directly to explain why she didn’t invite her mom to her birthday this year. “I don’t want [Amber] around but I do have abandonment issues from it,” Leah said.

“It doesn’t hurt me that she’s not here. It’s just the fact that she did it in the first place. When she was supposed to be there is what’s affecting me,” she continued.

Leah’s comments underscore something important. She isn’t rejecting her mother out of spite or rebellion – she’s trying to protect herself from being hurt again. It doesn’t matter how much Amber wants to be there now, as it doesn’t erase her pattern of not being there when it truly mattered. But instead of acknowledging Leah’s feelings, Amber’s focus remains on how her daughter’s actions impact her own emotionally.

This isn’t the first time Amber has lamented about not seeing her daughter. But it’s more than just venting . She keeps presenting herself as the victim, which fans have long accused her of doing, and it’s gotten old. Rather than taking responsibility for the pain Leah has expressed, Amber chooses to focus on how unfair the situation is for her.

However, Amber’s tone quickly shifted from understanding to dismissive as she downplayed Leah’s feelings.

"It’s not trauma. She doesn’t have trauma. Thank God. She’s had a rough life, yeah. But guys, not everything is trauma. And it’s not denial. You can’t call that trauma. I didn’t beat her."

Amber’s refusal to acknowledge her daughter’s perspective is telling. By minimizing Leah’s experiences and insisting that they don’t amount to trauma, Amber is effectively invalidating her daughter’s feelings. Instead of showing empathy, she deflects and insists that Leah should be grateful.

She continued, "Damn, I had a way worse life than she can imagine, more than half of you guys did. You can’t sit there and do that with your kids. You can’t sit there and pamper to the point of—you apologize for years, and people are being pushed away from you, and you’re still apologizing."

Amber’s insistence that Leah has nothing to be upset about doesn’t help absolve her; rather, it explains her daughter is keeping her distance. And doing so will only going to make their strained relationship worse.

Leah’s Distance From Amber Makes Sense

One of the most shocking moments in reality TV history unfolded on Teen Mom in 2010 when Amber was caught on camera physically assaulting her then-fiancé, Gary. The original footage (which aired on MTV but was later edited out of reruns) showed Amber punching, slapping, and choking Gary, even kicking him as he backed down a flight of stairs – all while their infant daughter was present.

This disturbing scene led to a domestic violence investigation, and Amber was subsequently charged with three counts of domestic violence, two of which were felonies. She later pleaded guilty to two felony counts of domestic battery and received a two-year suspended sentence with probation.

But that wasn’t the end of Amber’s legal troubles. In 2011, she was arrested for felony possession of a controlled substance and for violating probation terms, which included earning her GED and completing anger management training. A year later, she was sentenced to five years behind bars but was released early in 2013 for good behavior and for completing domestic abuse programs. During Amber’s time in prison, Gary was awarded full custody of Leah, and she’s lived with him ever since.

Amber was charged with domestic battery, criminal recklessness with a deadly weapon, and domestic battery in the presence of a child under 16. She pleaded guilty to two felony charges, domestic battery and intimidation, and was sentenced to probation and mandatory probation classes.

The pattern is hard to ignore: Amber’s violent outbursts and legal issues have created a chaotic environment for Leah, one that would be difficult for any child to endure, let alone having it all exposed on reality TV. Amber’s tendency to focus on herself rather than consider how these moments impacted Leah reinforces why Leah feels the need to create boundaries and is justified in doing so—it’s a form of self-preservation.

Leah Isn’t Responsible for Absolving Amber’s Guilt

“Leah is wanting to be adopted by Kristina,” Gary revealed on camera, adding that Kristina would agree to it “in a heartbeat.”

He continued, “Leah is kind of like, the damage is all done. I think [their relationship] is salvageable, but what Leah would need is for her mom to be there, all the time.” In that moment, even the other fathers on the show pointed out that it’s Amber’s responsibility to make the effort and repair the relationship.

But now that Leah is older, she’s taken more control of her own narrative. The teen has been increasingly vocal about her strained relationship with Amber and has made it clear that she’s the one who has chosen to scale back on visits.

Earlier this year, Leah opened up to her co-star, Cheyenne Floyd, during an episode of Teen Mom. Cheyenne, who has previously defended Amber, seemed to gain a new perspective while listening to Leah. It was a raw moment that allowed fans to see just how deeply Leah has been affected.

The conversation started with Cheyenne asking Leah if she had been talking to Amber recently.

"Not really. I haven't really talked to her or seen her in a while," Leah admitted. "It's fine. I don't really care anymore. I kind of want Kristina to adopt me. I've been wanting it for a while... Just because Kristina's been there for me since I was in kindergarten and even before that too."

"Obviously, she has a lot of different things going on, lots of difficulties. I just feel like I can't handle it... I wish I could," Leah said.

Remember, Leah is the child here, and Amber is the parent – it shouldn’t be Leah’s responsibility to manage her mom’s emotions. Yet Amber’s inconsistency hasn’t just been a thing of the past. Sure, she’s not behind bars anymore, but her behavior continues to be erratic and self-centered. Despite insisting that she wants to see Leah, Gary previously shared that Amber didn’t visit her daughter for months after her ex, Gary Wayt, disappeared and broke up with her. Amber’s pattern of putting herself and her relationships first has never really changed – and Leah seems to have finally caught on.

If Amber truly wants to repair her relationship with her daughter, she needs to make significant changes and, most importantly, respect Leah’s boundaries. Leah has learned to prioritize her own well-being, and that means protecting herself from Amber’s cycle of chaos. Setting healthy boundaries is the mature thing to do – one that shows she’s committed to not making the same mistakes. If Amber truly cares about reconnecting, she’ll have to take accountability for the hurt she’s caused and give Leah the space and time to decide if she wants to rebuild their relationship. Until then, Leah has every right to protect her own peace.